Here are some jokes found on the internet.
Disclaimer: Some people will find them funny. Some will not. I don't advocate making fun of people in any way at their expense. Generic jokes based on semantics can be funny, while personal ones can often be demeaning.
Dating Ad Translations
Want to know what the person is REALLY like behind those "nice" descriptions in Singles Ads? Here are some translations... when you read between the lines
DANDY LITTLE HOUSE KEEPER: She has been married three times and kept all the houses
FINE CHARACTER: She's an ex-hooker
KNOWS HOW TO HANDLE MONEY: She's a spend thrift and great at spending yours
STRONG FAMILY TIES: She's a Mafia Princess
LOVES CHILDREN: She's pregnant and needs a husband
WONDERFUL PERSONALITY: She's fat
GREAT SENSE OF HUMOR: She's fat and will laugh at anything you say
THE OUTDOOR TYPE: She hunts, fishes, chews tobacco, just like the guys
READY TO SETTLE DOWN: She's thirty-five, in a state of panic, and dying to marry
LIKES TO HAVE A GOOD TIME: She gets drunk every time she goes out
LOTS OF FUN AT PARTIES:Often makes an ass of herself
MATURE WOMAN: She's at least thirty, but looks at least forty-five
HAS THE APPEARANCE OF A YOUNG SCHOOL GIRL: She's at least thirty-three, but dresses like a teenager
CASUAL: She dresses like a slob
DECORATED HER OWN PLACE: Her apartment resembles a pig sty
A GREAT DANCER: She's a Stripper
NOT OVERLY EMOTIONAL: She only cries twenty-seven times a day
DOESN'T CHASE MEN: She's more of a mousetrap or a black widow spider type
SELDOM DATES: She's a lesbian who needs a male escort for something
UNDERSTANDS MEN: She's been married and divorced four times
A GOOD SPORT: She knows two hundred jokes & can drink you under the table
LOOKS AND DRESSES LIKE A MODEL: She's five eleven and weighs seventy-three pounds
BEEN IN SHOW BUSINESS: She's a former porn movie star
KNOWS A LOT OF INTERESTING PEOPLE: None of whom would marry her
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